PAPER CUT

this is my current state of mind.

Thank you

 I remember all of my darkest moments vividly. I still feel all those voice of encouragements around me. I see every single string of help that was dropped to save my soul.  I guess it's too late now... I can't even feel myself anymore. 

it hurts sometimes.

the feeling is terrible.

I woke up today with a dropped face and a heavy heart. I tried to break the yoke, but it was platinum trouble this time.  I was amazed to see a different person in the mirror when I went to wash up. The voices in my head were back.

I won't say that I'm possessed.

Nah. it's not an episode too. 

I am just a confused young man who can't live in the present. Every error I made in the past keeps on haunting me. I have a ton of personalities and a million faces to mask my pain.

I still leave in grayscale, playing different scenarios in my head. I wish I could avert my greatest error, but I can't. I can't bear to see my scars bleed out every single time.  I wish I could just disengage. 

all I have now in my misery filled life is a terrible curse and a 100 plus works that never let me rest alone. she was my everything, but I let her go.

it hurts ....  ...

husH 🤫