MORPHINE..

 

Let’s talk about the recent happenings and situation you all see. Each and every time, I see something paranormal yet no one believes me when I voice it out. I have been through enough all this while. The torments that this life drives me through makes everything feel irrelevant from my perspective. Sometimes, I stare the mirror and observe the soul I see in there.  Each and every time, I discover someone different, exceptional.  From dawn to dusk, they keep changing; no one stays forever. I hardly notice my true self these days. Their whispers keep filing my brains with thoughts I can hardly neglect. It’s not my fault either, I am way beyond the Cape of Good Hope.

It’s pretty disturbing to watch anxiety stretch its cold wings upon my life. I watch helplessly as happiness crawl away from my life. I shoot flares of hope into the sky yet, they glide uselessly across the horizon. Now, I am all alone, stuck in the middle of nowhere. I am surrounded by the gulf of pains. I guess no one can see me now.

It hurts to be a guy behind multiple masks, forcing hard to keep your flaws beneath the waves. It may sound stupid at first but, you will never wish to be in my shoes. It’s not because they are bigger and uncomfortable but, no one wants to trample barefooted on red-hot coals. You push harder and harder for change but magically end up in your same position each time you try.  I’m stuck in a loop with no tomorrow. The little effort you make in order to progress, turns out to be a step in the wrong direction with a huge backlash. The only perfect act worth considering is to lay low, all alone and wait for redemption.

Don’t be scared, come closer. You might consider the idea of getting me a therapist. Why not an exorcist? It’s pretty clear to all now, visible through the works I do, the words I say and a whole lot. I am, even scared of my recent actions. It feels like I am suffering from a multiple personality syndrome (if only such thing exist). I can’t count the number of special moments I have ruined. I don’t want to remember the faces of those people I have hurt. I just can’t take it anymore.